Sunday, 28 October 2012

Call to truncate 'working class' bus

Middle-class families are pleading with London Buses to alter the route of the much-hated 170 bus so that it no longer serves the sinister and notorious council estate at Roehampton. Leading local residents want the controversial service to be truncated at well-to-do Putney Heath so that they no longer have to travel in the same vehicle as lesser folk from the borough's poverty-stricken periphery.  
The hated 170 bus besieged by reckless yobs
The 170 bus has long played a crucial role in the borough's multifarious transport infrastructure. Beginning its long journey at Victoria station, it serves some of the most exclusive neighbourhoods of Chelsea, Battersea Village and Putney Heath. However rather than terminating by the heathside like most normal buses, the 170 controversially continues to Roehampton - a ghetto-like area plagued by violent disorder and yobbery. As a result, middle-class passengers are all too often confronted with distasteful scenes, as tracksuit-wearing single mothers jostle their way onto the crowded bus armed with Poundland carrier bags and cartons crammed full of smelly chicken nuggets.
Middle-class passengers trembling in fear
"The situation has become completely untenable," complained Selfridgia Aliceband as she hurried her daughter Timpani along to clavichord practice. "One does one's bit for the environment by taking the bus, and is veritably forced to travel with all these manky people. Why can't they have their own separate bus to take them to and from Poundland and the chicken nugget emporium?" 
Colonel Hartley of Tunbridge Wells, currently holidaying in the borough, echoed her thoughts. "I have to say I am shocked that buses used by respectable middle-class families are deliberately routed into festering centres of crime and antisocial behaviour. This would not happen in Tunbridge Wells. But then again - it is just typical of the way the Liberal Democrats have ruined this country since they got their hands on power. If only people had listened to WandsworthEye, whose trenchant and stentorian voice has been urging vigilance against LibDem excesses from the very outset."


  1. I think it's absolutely vile to call the people who ride the bus to Roehampton 'manky' and 'antisocial' This is exactly the sort of behaviour which caused the riots, and will continue to create animosity between lower class and working class people. You should be ashamed.

    1. WandsworthEye will never shy away from controversy!

      As a much-loved community news service, we fervently believe that all local residents should be able to travel throughout the borough unimpeded, unrestrained and unmolested - so long as they obey standards of general decency and decorum.

      However, those who insist on consuming vast cartons of nauseating chicken nuggets on public transport fall massively short of the required level of behaviour, and would be better advised to walk off their fat rather than take up precious room needed by respectable hardworking folk!

  2. You must really have nothing better to do. Written to the council yet?

  3. WandsworthEye is always thrilled to hear from its avid readers - even from those with dreary leftwing opinions.